Reluctantly, Rachel
Unpacking four shipments of kinky lingerie has made me realize I am the most profoundly unsexy person in the world.
Me: Welcome to our store! How can I help you?
Customer: I'm looking for something that doesn't exist and I'm going to get mad at you when I can't find it.
Me: :<
My mom said that since it’s easy to get dehydrated at work, I should drink a lot on my days off.

I think she meant water, but whatever.